I Hope They Weren't Jostled
by Monochrome-Colors
Summary: Sydney has fallen asleep at her computer once again, only to find that she accidentally ordered Hetalia units! With all the countries piling into her life, it's only a matter of time before something goes wrong. Can she survive the units who may or may not have been jostled? T cause I'm paranoid, no pairings, Lollidictator's unit manuals.
1. Chapter 1

FFFF- I don't even know if I'm going to start with this. It's just something I decided on the spot. I'm sorry if it sucks, I haven't thought this through at all. I may continue, or I may scrap this later, I don't know. Well, I've got nothing to lose except time, so let's get started with this.

I yawned and pulled myself up off my desk. Yes, sometimes I fall asleep on my desk, ok? Deal with it. I didn't even bother to look on my computer screen, probably because I thought that I had just fallen on the b button again and it was all over the page. I pulled on a plain red shirt and dark blue jeans and brushed our my long blonde hair, which I was considering getting cut. I walked down the hallway and into the small kitchen provided in the house that my parents had bought for me. I cooked myself some Pop-tarts and poured milk into a glass. I looked outside to the rising sun.

I set my glass down quickly and ran back to my room to grab my camera. Running quickly to the rooftop I leaned forward ever so slightly and clicked the picture button. I pulled my face away from the camera and looked at the glass screen that displayed the recently taken picture. It depicted an orange sun framed by two mountains and the faint outline of a bird in the middle of the sun. Perfect for a sale. I climbed back down to my bedroom and sat down at my computer.

"What the France is this?" I asked to no one in particular. 'Congratulations! You have purchased your very own Hetalia unit! Your unit will arrive in 3-5 days.'

...

Crap.

"Kaitlin? Kaitlin! Help me!" I said into the phone.

"What did you break this time, Sydney?" came the reply from the other end of the phone. I had called my friend, Kaitlin, who I had known since the 6th grade. She always assume I call because I broke something. ONE TIME. ONE TIME.

"Nothing! Yet... Not the point! I accidently ordered some Hetalia units!" I yelled into the phone. There was silence for a few seconds.

"Whaddya want me to do about it?" she asked.

"I'm afraid I'm going to get France." I whispered worridly into the phone.

"...I'll be right over." Kaitlin said before hanging up.

The next few days were spent in anxious waiting as we did whatever we could to keep ourselves occupied. Photography, drawing, writing, anything. It was the fourth day of waiting and I was outside playing with my diabolo when I heard a truck driving down the road. I turned my head away from my current activity, earning me a diabolo to the head. While I was cluthcing the throbbing spot on my head, the truck pulled up my driveway and a man climbed out in a green worker's uniform. The truck, upon further inspection, had green bunny ears and wings. I snickered. The man that got out of the truck walked over to me and held a clipboard out to me.

"Sign please." he said. I shrugged and signed the paper. He walked back to his truck and wheeled out two boxes. He set them down on the front step and turned to tip his hat to me. "Have a good day." he mumbled, walking back to his truck.

"Bye Fred!" I called after him. When a person has a name tag, you use it, okay? He didn't even look up at me when he started his car and drove off. '_Well, that was rude.' _ I thought, walking over the the two boxes. "CANADA!" I called. Oh yeah, Kaitlin=Canada.

"What do you want?" she asked, poking her head through the doorway and then seeing the boxes.

"Help." I said. She got the top smaller one and I got the bottom one, although it wasn't very big, it was kind of heavy. We set the two boxes in the living room and opened the smaller one first. The first thing to be pulled out was a faucet pipe. "Oh come on." I muttered.

"I think you got an Ivan." Canada said, putting the faucet pipe down and pulling out a bottle of vodka.

"Naw derp Sherlock, I thought I got Sealand." I replied, sarcasm dripping off my voice she stuck her tongue out at me as I stood to open the smaller box. "This looks too small to be an Ivan..." I whispered under my breath. I shrugged and began scratching at the box. "Brother... Brother... let's become one brother..." I whispered creepily. No response. Slightly worried and wondering if I had broken it, I lifted the lid off the top of the box. "Awwwww!" I squealed. Inside was a little Ivan, bundled up in a smaller version of his older coat. His violet eyes fluttered open, and they met my green ones.

"привет, are you Mother Russia?" he asked with wide eyes.

"No, I'm not, and please refrain from calling me that. You can call me сестра though." I said, reaching in a pulling out a little Ivan. He smiled and nodded.

"What am I, Canadian or something?" Canada said behind me.

"Yes. Ivan, this is my friend, Kaitlin. You can just call her Canada though, or сестра as well." I told Ivan, making use of the few Russian words I actually knew. Ivan just nodded again, but then he shivered.

"сестра, I'm cold." he whispered, shivering. I set him down and went over to the heating controls to turn it up a few degrees.

"Better?" I asked him. He nodded and went over to sit on the couch. Kaitlin and I followed him, turning on the TV. We watched House, iCarly, The Suite Life on Deck, and Criminal Minds. By then it was pretty late, so Kaitlin went back to her house and I carried Ivan down the hallway. "Let's see... Do you want to sleep in the spare room? There's no bed in there, but we can make do with some blankets and pillows." I thought, looking for Ivan's place to sleep.

"I think that's ok." Ivan said. I walked him in there and set him down.

"I'll go get some blankets and pillows, I'll be right back, ok?" I told him. He nodded his head and sat down in the middle of the room. He actually was kind of cute and not all that threatening when he was little. I walked back out into the living room and grabbed two blankets and a pillow for Ivan to sleep on. I walked back into the room and opened the door to find Ivan gone.

...

Crap.

"Ivan, Ivan, where are you?" I called. When there was no response, I started to get a little worried. "Ivan!" I yelled, suddenly running outside to look around. I started calling his name louder,

"Shut up!" One of my neighbors demanded.

"NO! I'm looking for a little dude, you shut up!" I screamed back. I turned and ran dow the street towards the playground. He's just as likely to end up there, seeing as there's a window looking out towards it from the room he was sitting in. I heard the creaking of the old swing as I got closer. "Ivan!" I called out.

"сестра!" I heard him call back. I ran and picked him up off the swing.

"Thank goodness I found you! Never leave the house again without me knowing, ok?" I reprimanded him. He nodded and I carried him back home.

"Did you find it?" my neighbor called.

"It's a him, and yes I did. Good night!" I yelled over to the neighbor. They called the same thing back and walked back into their house. My neighbors and I kind of have this love-hate relationship. Meh, I live nest to them, so I can't hate them all the time, can I? I set Ivan down in his "room" and walked out. "Good night."

"спокойной ночи." I heard him say before I closed the door. I walked back to my room and crawled into my bed.

"_ding...dong" _I heard the doorbell ring. I groaned and pulled myself out of bed. "_ding...dong"_ The doorbell rang again.

"Will ya shuddup? I'm comin'." I grumpily yelled at the door, knowing the person on the other side couldn't hear me. I yanked open the door, clearly strtling the delivery man on the other side. "There's more?" I asked. It was the same man from yesterday who had delivered chibi Ivan. He simply nodded and handed me the clipboard to sign. As I was signing, I felt something attached itself to my leg. I looked down to see Ivan clutching onto my leg and glaring at the delivery man.

"Hello." The delivery man said. Ivan just continued glaring. I laughed and pulled the giant box inside. The de- oh, right. His name is Fred. Fred seemed surprised that I could pull the box inside by myself. I grew up with three older brothers, it was either get strong or get beaten to a pulp.

"Ok. Can I have the manual? I want to keep all of my limbs, please." I asked Fred. He seemed to snap out of a trance and handed me a manilla folder.

"Bye." Fred said before walking out the door and into his car. Ivan kept on trying to stand on his toes to see who I got. I looked down and read the cover of the manual. "ARTHUR KIRKLAND: User Guide and Manual. I sighed. At least I didn't get France. I looked at the options and then threw the folder on the couch. I walked into the kitchen to start making what would be breakfast. Whether Arthur and Ivan liked it or not.

I finished the plate of hamburgers and quickly walked back out of the kitchen and over tot he box that was in front of my television. I placed the hambugers in front of the box.

"Alfred! Get that crap out of my face!" A English voice came from inseide the box. The box starting shaking and I took a step forward to get the plate of hamburgers away from the box (considering it was breakfast). Before I could get back, the box exploded and shards of the box were sent flying everywhere. There was something burning in my calf, then it increased to intense pain. I held in sobs as I looked down to find a large chunk of the wood had embedded itself in my leg.

"YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO BLOW THE FREAKING BOX UP!" I yelled at Arthur, who, after seeing me, apoligized for his behavior and began helping me down to the restroom where the first aid kit.

"I'm terribly sorry about this, love (because apparently English people say love...weird)." England apoligized.

"You couldn't help it, plus I was stupid enough to get too close the box. And don't call me 'love' it makes me feel like a lady. I'm not that fancy. My name is Sydney, OW!" I yelped in pain as I pulled out the wood and my leg started bleeding more than it had before. "Fudge..."

"сестра? Are you okay?" I heard a small voice from the door.

"Yes, I'm okay. Go watch TV, I'll be right out to make breakfast for you." I calmly told the small Russia, trying to stop the blood coming from my leg. I heard him grunt in agreement and close the door to the bathroom, leaving Arthur and I to tend to the wound on my leg.

That... wasn't that bad. Maybe I'll continue this story... Ok, I thought of something. If I get 5 reviews (small number powers!), then I will continue with this story. If I don't... then I dunno I'll do something.

Hetalia does not belong to me, but Sydney does. So ha. None of these awsome characters for you.


	2. Chapter 2

Herro! I am back! I would have been back sooner, but I didn't realize I had 6 reviews! My emails lied. Sorry. Ok, so this may be a really short chapter cos I'm on vacation in Florida right now. Woohoo~  
>Let's get this party started!<br>-

After fighting England for cooking rights (No, he will not be in my kitchen ANY TIME SOON), I cooked everyone some pancakes. I like pancakes. Especially with maple syrup...

DON'T QUESTION ME.

I had just started the dishes when I heard the doorbell ring. I made Englad take over cleaning the kitchen while I dried my hands on a towel and went to the door. I opened the door and immediately got glomped and poked.

"Hey, hey Austria! Austria hey!" my friend said, intentionally annoying me.

"Crona..." I said, closing my eyes and counting to ten to keep myself from instinctively hitting her.

"Vas?" she asked innocently. _Innocently. _That word just doesn't sound right to describe Crona. Once again, Crona is her nickname, her real name is Karly.

"Pancakes~!" Kaitlin cheered, smelling the leftover pancakes and running at top speed through the door. Crona sniffed the air and followed Kaitlin into the kitchen. I found them already seated and eating the pancakes leftover. England was staring at them.

"Friends?" he asked.

"Of sorts."

"HEY!" Crona and Kaitlin said at the same time. I chuckled (no giggles for me) and walked out into the living room where Ivan was watching television. As I sat down he crawled into my lap to watch TV there. I had to admit, he was really cute before he got all blood thirsty. I played with his hair before the doorbell rang again.

"YAY DOORBELLS!" Crona screamed, running to the door and throwing it open.

"Wait! Crona, you don't live here!" I yelled after her, but it was too late. I sighed and walked over to the open door while carrying Ivan who had begun to look sleepy. Cute. Crona was staring blank-faced at the delivery man standing outside the door. "Two in one day?" I asked him, pushing Crona out of the way, making her fall onto the floor. The de- crap, I keep forgetting he has a name. Fred was looking at her like she was crazy (which she was).

"Does she always do that?" he asked, craning his neck to look into the house.

"Yes."

"Who's at the door?" England asked walking out of the kitchen, wiping his hands on a towel.

"Buffalo Bill. Who do you think is at the door?" I said sarcastically. "I repeat my former question, two in one day?"

"Don't ask me, I only deliver." Fred passed me the clipboard. I signed without being asked. He handed me the manila folder and I looked at the name on it. I groaned.

" CANADA." I said with my hand over my face. Kaitlin popped her head out of the kitchen with a fork in her mouth.

"Yush?" she asked through the fork.

"I got the albino." Crona immediately jumped off the floor.

"I AM AWESOME!" she screamed. Right. Into. My. Ear.

"I need that eardrum." I growled, rubbing the offended ear. She shrank back.

"Sorry." she said, giving me the puppy-dog face. I sighed and signed for it while Kaitlin made her way over to the box. She began to poke is as Fred watched curiously.

"Were they here before?" He asked.

"No, and I don't know how they keep getting into my house." I said, looking through the ways to wake Gilbert up. I looked at Ivan, he had fallen asleep on my shoulder. Russian option is out. I set Ivan down on the couch and walked back over to the door.

"I'm out before anything goes wrong." Fred said (heh, that rhymed) "See you later." he half-waved before walking out the door and closing it behind him.

"See you later... that means there's going to be more?" I almost screamed, but then remembered Ivan sleeping on the couch. I rubbed my forehead saying, "Alright, Crona and I will hide behind the box, ready to grab him. Kaitlin, you get your ipod and play that piano app." I commanded. The two saluted me and got into their positions. Kaitlin began to play what I assumed were her scales, and Crona and I heard the box creak open. A red eye appeared in the crack and then a full body Prussia came out, attempting to jump on Kaitlin. I grabbed him by the collar, stopping him in mid-air as he fell to the ground.

Kaitlin squeaked out, "Maple..." and cowered in the corner. England was standing by, laughing and applauding. I bowed mockingly and pulled Prussia off the ground.

"Hello Prussia, I am Sydney, this is Crona, and the one you just scared is Kaitlin. I am the one who is your "owner" and I expect respect. The rules are-"

"I AM AWESOME! I do not need rules!" he said, cutting me off in mid-sentence. I grabbed him by the ear, pinching and twisting it slightly.

"You will follow these rules or you will be sleeping in Ivan's room. The rules are that you can get a job if you please, no beer in the living room, Gilbird _is _allowed to fly around the house, but you must keep him out of the kitchen. I think that's it, but I will add more if needed." I concluded, releasing his ear.

"Crazy *****." he muttered. I smiled creepily, and I was sure I was eminating a purple aura like Russia.

"I'm sorry, did you say something?" I questioned him, my voice matching my face. He shivered.

"N-nothing."

"Great, then we will get along just fine." I lost my creepy aura, and walked over to Ivan to pick him up and take him to my bedroom so Gilbert won't wake him.

Was that short? I think that was short. Meh, it'll get longer when I get a notebook for this story. So, are ya'll liking this story? I think it's pretty fun to write, if nothing else. Yeah...

~~~Here's a riddle~~~  
>-What is a question you cannot answer "yes" to?-<br>Post your answer in the reviews!

I do not own Hetalia or the manuals, if you think I do, I wish it was true (that rhymed... I rhyme a lot unintentionally).  
>&amp;~DNGoT~&amp; <p>


	3. Chapter 3

_Chaptah tres. Yo hablo español muy bueno :D  
>Okay, I'm done, sorry. <em>_I'm starting this chapter in the morning, so I apologize if there are a lot of spelling or grammar errors in the first part T.T_

_Congratulations to Swirly592 for guessing the correct answer to the riddle first. The answer was, "Are you asleep?"  
>Also congratulations to <em>_Terat__Tear__Terahr__ Terachanglianzylan for guessing two correct answers, "Are you asleep?" and "Are you dead?"  
>Since Swirly was the first, she will now be a part of my story. Yaaaaay~<em>

"I'M A DINOSAUR!" Crona yelled, stomping around without purpose. I had managed to get Prussia to calm down by giving him a beer (I keep them around, they make good weapons) and England was in charge of watching my friends plus Gilbert while I went out to get more food and such. When I opened the door, Courtney was standing there. I resisted the urge to groan loudly. '_Why does everything happen when I don't want it to?'_ I thought.

"Hey Sydney! Whatcha doin?" she asked. Oh, and one more thing that makes this worse. She's one of my normal friends. She doesn't know about Hetalia.

"Heh, just going out to get-"

"I AM AWESOME!" Prussia yelled behind me. I stepped out and shut the door, preventing Courtney from seeing inside.

"What was that?" Courtney asked, trying to stand on her toes to see past me. Thank you God for making me tall.

"Nothiiiiing..."

"BLOODY ****!"  
>"Maple..."<br>"DINOSAURS!"  
>"Where's the beer?"<br>"сестра?"

I sighed. Now Ivan was awake. I can't leave him in there, but if I go in, Courtney will see. What the heck, it doesn't matter anymore, she's already heard.

"Whatever. Come on in Courtney." I sighed, opening the door again. She walked in first, and then stopped in the living room. "Everyone SHUT UP!" I yelled, closing my eyes and counting to ten again before opening my eyes to survey the damage. England and Gilbert were fighting on the floor, Kaitlin was in the corner again, Crona was hanging from the ceiling fan, and Ivan was in the hall looking very confused. Ivan walked over to me and I picked him up. "I am going to go put Ivan back to sleep, and I don't want to hear a peep, unless it's from Gilbird." I glared. Everyone, even Courtney, sat on the couch and waited for me to come back.

When Ivan finally fell asleep again, I went back into the living room. Everyone turned their heads towards me, Courtney still clearly confused.

"Sydney? Why do you have two men and a little child in your house?" she asked. PFFFT. That sounded weird. I sighed and rubbed my forehead.

"Ok, you remember that anime show I always talked about in middle school?" I asked, trying to think of a good way to explain it.

"Yeah..."

"Well, these are the guys from that show. Before you say anything, I'll try to explain. See, I accidentaly ordered these units from that show, which are basically life-sized walking, talking, and eating androids that act like the characters from the show. Does that make sense?" I explained, searching my brain for something I may have missed.

"Yes. Why do you have a little child?" she leaned back to look for the room I put Ivan in.

"Well, he was supposed to be an adult unit, but they sent me him as a little kid and I don't feel like sending him back, so he stays. And he's kinda cute before he gets all blood thirsty." I thought. Courtney nodded her head.

"I AM AWESOME!" Prussia suddenly yelled.

"NO! Shush. Corner." I directed Prussia to the corner he would sit in for interrupting me. "That was Prussia, the blonde one is England, and the little one is Russia." I introduced, pointing to each country and the back room in turn. Courtney stared and shook her head, obviously trying to wrap her mind around this whole concept.

"So, you're living in a house alone with three men?" she sighed.

"Technically one of them is a child and yes." I answered. Then I realized what she meant. "OH, NONONO EWWWW. Dude, that's gross." I shook my head vigorously, feeling the heat rising to my face. I looked over at England, who had gotten bored and started reading one of my many books a long time ago. No. I looked at Prussia, still in the corner I banished him to, but know he was laughing the laugh that only a Prussia can laugh. NO.

"Sorry for the thought, but you've gotta admit..." Courtney trailed off.

"Yeah, I guess so, but still; ew." I shivered. Courtney looked around my house, her blonde hair whipping around as her head turned.

"Weren't those other two girls just here?" she asked.

"What other- oh… whoops." I sweat dropped, remembering my friends that had magically disappeared somewhere. "I think I know where they are though." I sighed, walking to my bedroom. My bedroom was on the second floor, so I made loud stomping noises as I walked up them just to scare the life out of them. I grabbed onto the handle of my room and pulled it open. Empty. I walked in and looked around. "Hey, look, Steve is behind you."

"WHERE?" Crona yelled, popping her head out from under my bed. She looked around frantically, but then realized to alien-monster-thing from HetaOni wasn't around. Kaitlin was still nowhere to be found, and that usually gets them both.

"Canada?" I called, looking around. I heard snickering from above and looked up. My mouth dropped. "HOW THE HECK DID YOU EVEN GET UP THERE?" I screamed. She laughed as she sat on the top part of my canopy bed, which thankfully had a wooden ceiling part.

"I am MAGIC!" Kaitlin yelled before jumping off the bed and landing next to me. I sighed and rubbed my forehead, and then I heard a tap on the window. I turned around to see my friend Swirly outside on the roof that connected to the house right under my window.

"You do realize you're standing on the roof of my kitchen, right?" I laughed, opening the window. Swirly looked down and laughed before climbing in my window. She never has used the front door… oh well. I surveyed the three girls in front of me. I should probably tell you what I see.

Kaitlin was a bit shorter than me, with straight brown hair cut to her shoulders. She wore three (Hetalia) bandanas around her neck which covered the collar of her blue shirt. She wore a black jacket over that shirt, even though it was practically the middle of spring. Black jeans and boots completed her outfit along with square-shaped glasses.

Crona had somewhat lighter brown hair, cut and styled to look like Gumi's from Vocaloid (look it up, I don't know how else to explain it). She was wearing a Death the Kid shirt with a blue and black skirt under which she had black leggings that were tucked into knee-high converse. She also had on a sweatband around her wrist with Ed from Fullmetal Alchemist on it.

Swirly had short brown hair, about the same shade as Kaitlin's. She wore a neon green tank top with an orange jacket hoodie. She was also wearing white jeans and red converse. A rainbow colored clip was keeping her hair back.

We headed back down the stairs. Oh, right, you probably need to know what Courtney looks like as well. She was pretty plain, dirty blonde hair kept back in a ponytail with a light green dress on and black dress shoes. (A/N: Sorry for the long descriptions, I'm good at writing those /shot) Courtney turned to meet us and did a double take.

"Weren't there only two?" she asked, pointing to Swirly standing behind me.

"Swirly came in through the window."  
>"O-okay…" Courtny shook her head. She learned long ago not to question my explanations. "Well, I'm getting out of here before another one of these "units" arrive." Courtney called over her shoulder while walking out the door. She closed the door and Prussia immediately jumped up.<p>

"I AM AWESOME!" he yelled. He then noticed us staring at him like he was stupid. Which he was. "Would any of you girls like to see my awesome five meters?" he grinned pervertedly. Crona got a nosebleed.

"How about no. I still have to go shopping." I glared at him, grabbing my reusable shopping bag. "Crona, don't bleed on the carpet. England, you wanna come with me? If the house burns down, I don't want _everyone _dead." I turned towards the island nation who looked up from his book.

"Sure." He said, closing his book and setting it down. Crona snickered.

"What?" I glared at her. She look at me with a 'what-do-you-think' face.

"That's obviously not the reason~." She practically sang. I felt myself blush and promptly stomped out of the house with England following me.

"What did she mean by that?" England asked once we were in the car driving away from the house. I felt my blush deepen.

"Well, we used to have these really spaztic parties when we were younger, and I kind of lost a bet." I began to explain, keeping my eyes locked on the road.

"What kind of bet?" England inquired.

"I can't exactly remember. But it was the consequences that my friends will never let me live down. You see, we had this Hetalia poster in Crona's room, and I was dared to pick the country that I liked the best. Back then I was really shy about that stuff (still am) and had to be pushed pretty hard. Once I say I like something, specifically someone, my friends will grip onto that saying as if their lives depended on it. After some persuasion, I was actually in front of the poster. Then my friend pushed me on the back and I ran face-first into the wall, landing on the picture of you." I saw him blush lightly out of the corner of my eyes.

"You're not one of those crazy fangirls like my last owner, right?" he asked nervously. I saw him swallow and I laughed.

"No, I do have my inner-fangirl like everbody. I manage to keep it under control… most of the time." I slammed the breaks and swerved out of the way of an oncoming car on the wong side of the road "HEY, LEARN TO DRIVE YOU FREAKING MORON!" I yelled out the window. I righted the car and saw England relax.

"That was exciting." He said.

"Normal. And the worst part about what just happened there is I know that guy." I wasn't lying. That was the car of one of the guys from my old college. England stared at me.

"You _know_ people like that?"

"Not willingly. If I had the choice, I would be somewhere in Japan, farthest away from him. Or maybe I'd go to Russia… or Seychelles… no Germany. Or Poland." I started naming off all the countries I wanted to visit. "Hey look, we're here. Yayyyyy." I said, parking the car and getting out with my purse. England followed me in and we started shopping for the things I needed. I stopped when we were close to the check-out aisle and looked him up and down. "You need more clothes." I decided, turning the cart around and heading to the mens' section. I started randomly guessing everyone's sizes (Yes, I am planning for more units. Overpreparing), which I was pretty good at. I usually ended up shopping for my brother, so I kind of based sizes for everyone off him. That, and England helped.

Okay, now we were done. We got in the car and headed back to my house, not almost dying that time.

"AMG IT'S A SYDNEY~!" Crona jumped out of the front door, immediately glomping me.

"Ack! Off, off, OFF!" I yelled, pushing her off of me. "Geez, I don't like being touched." I glared at her. She simply blinked and started poking me.

"Hey, hey Austria." She chirped. I rolled my eyes. "Austria, hey, hey Austria. You know you can't hide the fact that you love me." She said in a fake German accent.

"I very well can, considering the fact that it's NON-EXISTENT." I growled, getting very irritated. She shrugged and skipped back into the house right as Swirly and Kaitlin came out. "Well, ain't she just the most helpful person." I mumbled.

"It's not 'ain't', it's 'isn't'." England corrected me. Kaitlin walked up to him.

"Hello fellow Grammar Nazi." She said before grabbing the bags out of the trunk.

"Uhm, hello?" England replied. I laughed and grabbed some bags as well. Swirly started to help, but then got distracted by the butterflies in my garden. I walked in after I finished to find Crona and Prussia on the couch watching TV.

"Gee, thanks for the help guys." I said sarcastically.

"Your welcome." Crona replied, her eyes glued to the television. They were watching Blue Exorcist. I briefly wondered how she got my Netflix password.

"I'm cooking food." I said.

"NO!" Kaitlin, Crona, and Swirly (who had come inside) shouted all at once.

"Why shouldn't she cook?" Prussia asked.

"Because she _can't_ cook." Swirly emphasized 'can't' to an extent.

"I resent that." I pouted "I can cook. I can cook Pop-tarts, pasta, pancakes, cereal, and pre-shaped hamburgers."

"Sydney, you once burnt the water at our youth retreat." Kaitlin pointed out.

"I WAS 14, OKAY?"

"You burnt water?" England stared at me "Is that possible?"

"Yes." I replied sharply, walking up to my room. "Crona, make ramen."

"Yay Ramen!"

I was on my laptop, checking Deviantart. One of my friends had been sad that she couldn't go to a con, so as I friend I felt obligated to cheer her up. Harder than it sounds.

"JUST CHEER UP, DARN IT!" I screamed, shaking my computer. I gave up and pulled up Youtube. I flipped through various videos before finally settling on 'This is War' by 30 seconds to Mars.

(A/N: LOOK UP THE LYRICS YOU LAZY PEOPLE.)

I opened my eyes as the last lyrics to the song ended. I looked to my door to find Prussia and England staring at me in dismay. Huh. Guess I don't look like a singer.

"May I help you?" I asked, sitting up on my bed. They seemed to snap out of some sort of trance and addressed me.

" The food is done." England said. Prussia was looking around my room. Way to be a creeper, Prussia. He opened the little door to the small side attic where I kept most of my anime stuff.

"THE AWESOME ME IS IN HERE!" Oh yeah. I have Hetalia posters in there.

"Of course you're in there, git. We can see you." England sighed, obviously irritated.

"No, there is a picture of me on the wall!" Prussia yelled back. England looked confused before following him there. I followed in afterwards, only to find both the boys circling the room, looking at all the anime scrolls on my walls. And my manga collection. And my anime collection.

I have inner fangirl :3

"Oh, right food. Out." I commanded, pointing to the door. They ducked their heads and walked out (because the door is small OK.).

_This chapter was loong. And it took really long to update. Why am I talking in italics? I don't know. It's fun. Uhm… I should probably put up another riddle…_

_~~~Here's a riddle~~~_

_-When John was six years old he hammered a nail into his favorite tree to mark his height. Ten years later at age sixteen, John returned to see how much higher the nail was. If the tree grew by five centimeters each year, how much higher would the nail be?__-_

_Post your answers in the reviews!_

_I do not own Hetalia or the concept of manuals for Hetalia Units. If you think I do, you need to read the A/N more.  
>&amp;~DNGoT~&amp;<em>


	4. Chapter 4

_I'M NOT DEAD!_  
>Hannah: Darn.<br>_What are you doing here? You're not even in this story!_  
>Hannah:… So?<br>_Creeper._  
>Camryn: That's my job!<br>_YOU AREN'T IN THIS STORY EITHER!_  
>Sydney: Just start writing!<p>

~DNGoT~

"Why do you have so much ramen?" England asked me.

"Cosplay meetings." I replied simply. I grabbed a cup and sat down at the table. Ivan had woken up and was sitting next to me.

"Where'd Kaitlin and Crona go?" Prussia asked, taking a break from shoving ramen into his mouth.

"How am I supposed to know? You guys were the ones who were down here the whole time." I retorted. "I suppose they went home."

"I'm still here! Can I stay?" Swirly asked.

"Sure why not." I shrugged. Then the phone rang, " Ivan, could you go get that?" I asked the small nation.

"Da," he replied, jumping out of his chair and running over to the wall phone. He couldn't reach it. "England, can you get that?" I asked, turning to England who had just finished his tea. He sighed and walked over to the phone.

"Hello?" he answered. There was a pause and then he held the phone out to me. "It's for you."

"Naw derp, Sherlock." I said sarcastically, snatching the phone away from him. He glared at me and sat back down. "Hello?"

"_Hi Sydney!"_ The sound of my mother's voice sang through the phone.

"Hi mom."  
><em>"Why did a boy's voice answer the phone?"<em>  
>"Uhhh…" I thought. Boys were never at my house. "Uhm, my friend was working on her cosplay voice?"<br>_"Oh, okay. Have you checked your e-mail?"_  
>"…No…"<br>_"CHECK IT NOW."_  
>"Ok, ok." I obliged, getting my computer and opening my e-mail. The most recent one said 'HAPPY BIRTHDAY'. My birthday was a week ago. I shrugged and opened the e-mail. I screamed. England, Prussia, and Ivan ran into the room. Nice to know Swirly cares for me.<p>

"What happened?" England exclaimed.

"сестра?" Ivan ran over to me and I hugged him.

"Why the **** did you scream?" Prussia asked, rubbing his ear.

"Sorry! My parents just sent me my birthday present!"

"What did they send you, сестра?"

"My dream house!" I exclaimed. My parents hadn't sent me presents for five years, claiming that they were having money issues, but it wasn't anything I needed to worry about it. I didn't think anything of it until now!

"_Sydney?_" Oh yeah, my mom's still on the phone.

I picked it up, "Yeah, I'm still here," I took a deep breath "OMG THANK YOU SO MCH, THIS IS THE BEST BIRTHDAY PRESENT EVER!"

"_You're welcome! The house is that old bed-and-breakfast with 20 rooms, 10 bathrooms, and open lobby, a living room with a TV, a large kitchen, and a basement._" My mom said, painting a picture of the house inside my mind. "_The house is pre-furnished, so you can move in right away! You can pack all your clothes and such in a suitcase, along with all that anime stuff that you love._"

"Thank you so much!"

"_I'm glad you like it. Alright, I have to go now, love you."_

"Love you too." I said, hanging up. I got up and started walking. Then I fainted.

~DNGoT~

"…ney. Sydney! SYDNEY!" I heard a voice calling me. I opened my eyes to three faces standing over me.

"Am I dead?" I asked.

"Well, I should hope not, seeing as you must sign for another unit." England said. I sat up and looked to the door where Fred the Delivery Man stood with a clipboard.

"Meh." I said, standing up from the couch.

"Good morning, sunshine." Fred said sarcastically.

"Just gimme the darn clipboard." I snapped, grabbing it from him. I signed it and he handed me a manila folder. 'ALFRED F. JONES: User Guide and Manual' was printed on it. I turned and banged my head against the wall. A loud, obnoxious, energetic American was about the _last _thing I wanted. At least he could help with moving. Fred wheeled the box in and then left promptly. "IGGY! GET YOUR BUTT OVER HERE I NEED YOUUUUU!" I yelled to the countries that had gone into the kitchen.

"Do you have to scream so loudly?" England scolded me.

"Yes." I replied as the box began to shake. The lid popped open and a sandy blonde haired man with blue eyes and glasses popped out.

"HAHAHAHAHA! The hero is here!"

"Joy, joy, we all rejoice. Both of you help me pack." I commanded, still grumpy from sleeping. "Oh, and my name's Sydney." I grumbled in addition, walking back through the living room. "Prussia, you have to come help too. Bring Ivan." I told the albino before he could raid my fridge. He groaned and followed me as well, and I picked up Ivan.

"Куда мы идем?" the tiny nation asked me (_Where are we going?_). I saw America stiffen out of the corner of my eyes. (A/N: Anything you see in italics and parentheses are translations)

"До моей комнате. Мы должны упаковать." I responded (_Up to my room. We have to pack.)_ Now America backed away, making me roll my eyes. "Don't worry America, I'm not Russian, and this Russia is too sweet to do anything right now."

"Oh yeah? Then why do you speak Russian?" America snapped.

"Uhm, I'm bilingual? Watashi wa nihongo o hanasemasu, Ich kann Deutsch sprechen, and Mogę mówić Polskiej. I'm working on Russian, I have yet to master that particular language…" I said, remembering my many attempts to speak the Russian language.

"Did anyone else see that Swirly girl leave?" Prussia asked, completely changing the subject. I face palmed.

"Way to change the subject. And my friends pop in and out whenever they want to, or she got distracted by another butterfly." I shrugged.

~DNGoT~

A few hours later (I have no idea how many), we had managed to shove everything into my car.

"Accomplishment!" I yelled, throwing my hands in the air. "Into my magical car that can somehow hold all my crap." I commanded. "Shotgun has to hold Ivan." I added. I have a small car, okay? The three grown countries all ended up squishing in the connected back seat with Ivan sitting up front and me in the driver's seat. I bet Ivan feels loved. I sighed and backed out of the driveway.

~DNGoT~

In about 30 minutes we had reached our destination; my new house.

"You're new house is really close to your old one." America commented.

"I know, I don't care." I replied. "This house is freaking awesome!" The front of the house looked somewhat like the one in HetaOni, which creeped me out a little bit. The front was painted white and the roof (which was flat at the top) had orange-brown shingles. On either side of the door were small flower gardens. I made everyone help carry my things inside along with their own stuff ('cause I'm too lazy to make second trips~). Downstairs was the lobby which had a door to the right which led to the kitchen, a small living area in the left corner near the door, a door on the left wall near the corner which I assumed lead to the basement, and a door to the left of the stairs which was the master bedroom. The second floor had 10 bedrooms, 4 of them being taken up by the countries that had creeped their way into my life. The third floor had 9 bedrooms, and the right wall led to a balcony on which there was a ladder attached to the outside wall so you could climb up to the roof. I walked into the kitchen and looked around. Large. Big. Almighty. I decided to order take-out

"Hello, thank you for calling Pizza Hut, what do you want to order?" the worker asked. I ordered two large cheese and a medium pepperoni. I like pizza.

It came not long afterwards, causing America to immediately come downstairs and the other countries to follow at a more modest pace. England looked at the greasy pizza with disgust but managed to eat a little anyways. Hooray for American food!

After dinner, we all decided to watch Inception. It ended with Ivan falling asleep, America and Prussia very confused, and England and I laughing at the two idiots because we understood, if only slightly.

"Everyone, I declare that we must sleep now." I dramatically declared.

"But what if we get stuck in our dreams?" America asked with nervous glances.

"Then I hope it's a dream with lollipops and unicorns. If it's not, then I wish you the best of luck." I said with a serious face. Before anyone could say anything else, I walked into my room and closed the door behind me. I turned around to face the interior of my new sleeping quarters. It was larger than my last one, fitting a desktop, a queen bed, a dresser, and various stuffed animals. I changed into my pajamas, brushed my teeth, and leapt into my bed.

~DNGoT~

I got up at 7:00 the next morning, not immediately understanding where I was. Then I realized it was my new house. With my new units. I groaned and rolled out of bed, landing on the floor with a thud. Without bothering to put on real clothes, I walked out into the lobby. Wood is cold in the morning. Running into the kitchen to avoid frostbite attacking my feet, I stopped to find England dressed, reading the newspaper, and drinking tea. I don't have tea.

"Da fudge is wrong with you man? How can you get up so early?" I asked him. He looked me up at me, apparently just then noticing me standing there.

"Nice clothes." He snickered. I looked down, realizing I was in a white camisole and batman pajama pants.

"Why thank you, I try my best to look as epic as possible." I replied just as sarcastically. I skipped over to the cabinet and poured myself a bowl of Fruit Loops.

Don't judge me. Sugary cereals are awesome.

"Doesn't eating sugary cereals all the time get old?" England asked, grimacing at the way I dug into my cereal.

"Pssht, no way man. I'm an American fatty and I'm proud." I laughed.

"Who told you that you were fat?" Kaitlin asked from the doorway.

"Where'd you get my address, how'd you get into my house, and no one. I've just always assumed it." I said, not even turning around to face her.

"Your mom posted it on Facebook, you know I can pick locks, and you're not fat." Kaitlin replied. She took a bowl of cereal for herself and sat down next to me. Then the doorbell rang.

"NOOOOOO!" I screamed. Then I got up and walked to the door.

"Nice pajamas." Fred greeted when I opened the door.

"Nice truck." I replied.

"Point taken." He nodded, "Sign, please."

"Derpy." I said randomly, taking the clipboard and signing it in the appropriate place. He handed me a manual that said, 'FRANCIS BONNFOOIS: User guide and Manual.'. "Aww… but I like my virginity…" I mumbled, pulling the box inside. "Bye." I said, closing the door.

"Who'd you get this time?" Kaitlin asked, poking the box.

"England's worst nightmare." I said, crumpling to the floor.

She stopped poking the box and backed away saying, "I know he's my papa, but he's still a rapist." She takes her Canada cosplay very seriously.

"Speak French." I commanded.

"Okay. Je parle français. Je n'aime pas ça. Pourquoi ai-je apprendre le français à nouveau?" she said (_I am speaking French. I don't like it. Why did I learn French again?_). I had no idea what she was saying, but it seemed effective. France jumped out of the box, immediately hugging Kaitlin.

"NO! Off my friend or I swear I will rip your vital regions off." I growled. France held his hands up and backed off.

"Ah, but don't you think I must spread amour everywhere I go?" he said dreamily (_love_). Creepy.

"No. There's breakfast in the kitchen."

"MY FRUIT LOOPS!" Kaitlin yelled, running back to the kitchen. France followed and America bounded down the stairs with Ivan following him.

"Breakfast in the kitchen." I pointed. They went inside and I went in last. What I saw that day scarred me forever.

~DNGoT~

_CLIFF HANGER~!  
><em>Britony: You really like those, don't you?  
><em>Yeah- YOU AREN'T IN THIS STORY EITHER!<br>_Britony: No, but I am your beta.  
><em>Oh yeah. Marker fight! *starts jabbing Britony with multi-colored pens*<br>_Britony: HEY! *jabs back*  
>Kaitlin: *sigh* Death Note Gal of Tomatoes does not own Hetalia or any of the characters.<br>_And one more thing, I will no longer be doing riddles because I only did that to get more people into my story, but a bunch of friends at school are asking me if they can be in it, so I'll just use them as my victims.  
>Hasta la rainbows~!<br>~DNGoT~_


	5. Chapter 5

_*Falls over and rolls on floor*_

Sydney: Whatcha doin'?

_I'm boreeddddd…_

Britony: Isn't that why you're typing?

_Yup._

Kaitlin: Is this going to be a long author's note?

_*shrugs*_

America: Yo dudes! Where am I?

_Oh boy…_

**=Monochrome-Colors=**

What I saw that day scarred me forever.

"AHHHHHHH!" I screamed, "FRANCE! GET YOUR CLOTHES BACK ON!" I grabbed Ivan and covered both out eyes. "France, I swear that if you take off your clothes in any place other than your own room, you will be sleeping in the garden." I threatened. After that little epidemic was over, I went to my room to check my interweb things.

"Ohonhonhon, so this is your-"

"Get out." I growled. I hated people in my room.

"But mademoiselle, it is such a lovely room. What is in this dresser?" he asked. I snapped. Before I knew it I was holding France by the collar of his shirt and had pushed him against the wall.

"Get. Out_. Now_." I growled again. I heard the door open and whipped my head around.

"Am I interrupting something?" America asked from the doorway.

"No." I dropped France who quickly scrambled out of the room. "Baby." I muttered.

"What was that all about?" America asked.

"I don't like people in my room without my permission." I said after taking deep breaths to calm myself down.

"Do I have permission?"

"Sure, why not." I laughed. He looked at me strangely. "Sorry, it's just that nobody's ever really asked permission before. I guess they just assume I'm joking." He shrugged and jumped onto my bed. "Sure, make yourself at home." I walked back over to my computer and sat down.

**=Monochrome-Colors=**

After about an hour I stopped drawing to rub my eyes and stretch my back. I turned around to see that America had fallen asleep. I sighed and walked out of the room and into the lobby. Courtney was standing at the door with England and France trying to strangle each other in front of her.

"You derps." I muttered, pulling the two fighting countries apart. "If you're going to fight, go fight in the basement where you're less likely to break something. " I scolded them. They muttered and stomped off in the opposite direction. "Other way." They turned around. I have authority.

"Was that normal?" Courtney asked.

"Yes." I said as America walked out of my room rubbing his eyes. "Nice to see you're awake."

"I know. Who's this dudette?" he asked, yawning.

"Her name is Courtney, and how can you still be tired? You were just sleeping." I replied. He grumbled and went into my kitchen, no doubt to make some coffee.

"Can I ask who that was?" Courtney asked, turning my attention back towards herself.

"That was the one and only, AMERICA!" I said, striking a dramatic pose.

"You knows it!" America shouted from the kitchen.

"Shush! MY conversation! Do you want to see the house, Courtney?" I asked. She nodded and stepped inside.

"Starting from the basement (where England and France are currently fighting), it is basically one big game room. Right now it only had a few arcade games and an Xbox 360, but you know. The collection will grow over time. The door down there in the far left corner leads to my anime room, and you can make an educated of what that's for. Next is the lobby (where we are) and there's a door on the right wall the leads to the kitchen and the wall to the left of the stairs is where the door to my bedroom is. The door behind the stairs leads out into the garden. The far left corner is where the stairs to the basement are, and the corner closer to the front is where the door to the movie room is. The next floor is circular, and it has 10 doors, all leading to different rooms. Continue up the stairs to the next floor and you'll find 10 more rooms, except this floor is rectangle like with three walls covered by the doors. The fourth wall is open, leading out onto the balcony. On the wall outside, there is a ladder leading up to the roof (which is flat). Pretty cool, huh?" I explained as we walked through the house.

"Wow." she was all she said. I laughed.

"You want to stay for dinner?" I offered. We went back down to the lobby and into the kitchen. We made steak, seeing as I love meat and forgot to shop for anything else. Well, actually she cooked it, I stood by and tried not to make anything catch fire. I was looking around the big kitchen and found a button and a microphone attached to the wall. "What's this do?" I asked aloud, pushing the button. I heard my voice echo throughout the house. "Oh cool! It's one of those call button things! Ok, uhm... Dinner's ready! We're having steak! Also, someone bring me my laptop." I said into the microphone. Everyone gathered in the kitchen, and no one brought me my laptop. "I'm glad you guys care for me. Love you too." I said sarcastically. I walked out of the room and came back with laptop in hand before anything could explode. "Where's Prussia?" I asked when I noticed the missing albino.

"Gil is here?" France asked. I face palmed. They're never any help. I walked out to check the garden. Found him.

"What are you doing?" I sighed.

"I lost Gilbird! He fell into the yellow flowers and now I can't find him!" he panicked. I turned and banged my head against the wall. Why did I think the answer was going to be intelligent? I made a total guess and used Rue's call from the Hunger Games. Something chirped the same tune back to me. I honestly didn't expect that to work. I turned around and saw Prussia nuzzling Gilbird to his neck.

"That was so random." I shook my head and disbelief and followed Prussia into the kitchen.

**=Monochrome-Colors=**

"I knew there was a reason I loved food." I said, leaning back in my chair.

"I'm going to head home. Bye Sydney and... Others..." Courtney waved over her shoulder. Right as she closed the door my chair tipped back and I fell over. I stuck my thumb in the air.

"I'm good." I said, rubbing the back of my head as I stood up again.

"Git, you're going to get yourself killed one day." England sighed.

"Someday is not today and I'm too awesome to die." I replied. "France, did you pick your bedroom?"

"I assumed I would be rooming with you."

"You assumed wrong. Second floor, your _own_ room." I told him, pointing up. He trudged away, but then I remembered something. I ran over to the microphone and pushed the button. "Oh, and we have church tomorrow. Pick out nice_, decent_ clothes!" I said into the microphone. I heard someone groan but ignored it, going back to my room. I saw another microphone thing next to my bed. Wake up call found. The rest of the day was spent either on the computer or on the couch in front of the TV.

**=Monochrome-Colors=**

I held my IPod up to the microphone. Pushing the play button and the microphone button at the same time, I blasted an alarm throughout the house. I turned off the alarm and held the microphone next to my mouth.

"Wake up you lazy butts; it's time to get ready for church!" I yelled. I skipped out of my room in my Austria cosplay dress (it's the only dress I own and we're having a fancy day at church) and started making pancakes. I heard several chairs slide out and people sit down. I turned to see America, France, and England seated at the table. I walked over to the microphone, "Prussia, Ivan, get down here now." I said.

"сестра!" I heard Ivan scream. I ran upstairs and opened the door to Ivan's room. I found Prussia hanging the small (large?) nation by one of his feet.

"Prussia..." I growled. He paid me no attention. Wrong. I grabbed Ivan, flipped him so he was upright, and then kicked Prussia where it hurts. "Prussia, go back to your room. You have 10 minutes to get ready before I remove all alcohol from the premises." That got him moving. "Are you okay Ivan?" I asked setting him down gently He held onto me a little longer before letting go and nodding his head.

"Da." he said quietly, sniffling. I kissed him on the forehead and went back downstairs to make sure nothing was exploding and/or broken. Prussia beat me down there.

"You can move faster than I can." I said, surprised. He just grunted. I'm going to make a wild guess and say that he's mad at me. After Ivan came down, everybody piled into the car. I will honestly never know how they all fit, nor will I question it for the sake of my sanity. When we got to church, everyone tumbled out. "No cussing, running, screaming, or acting like children with the exception of Ivan because he is a child." I told them. "I'm the preacher, so I won't be able to keep an eye on you-"

"You're the preacher?" America interrupted.

"Yes. As I was saying, I won't be able to keep an eye on you, so behave." I commanded. They nodded and I sent Ivan off to the children's class. I directed the rest to sit in the third row and I jumped up on stage.

**=Monochrome-Colors=**

Halfway through the sermon, I saw England and France shoving each other in their seats. I cleared my throat, hoping to catch their attention. It didn't work (surprise, surprise). Trying to keep the sermon going, I eyed America, silently begging him to stop their fighting. He didn't get it. Prussia wasn't paying attention which made me mentally face palm. Luckily, one of my friends sitting behind the two morons saw what I was trying to do and made them stop. I made a mental note to thank him later.

**=Monochrome-Colors=**

"Conner! Conner!" I called, running after the person that saved my sermon.

"Hey." He said.

"Thanks for stopping those two idiots over there." I said, jutting my thumb towards the general direction England and France were in.

"No problem. They friends of yours?" he asked. I had to think about that.

"I guess…" I replied uncertainly, cocking my head a bit to the side in confusion. He laughed at my confusion and I punched him in the arm.

"сестра!" I heard Ivan call me. How did I know it was Ivan? Because I'm fairly certain that he's the only little kid in this establishment who can speak fluent Russian. I turned around and saw the small nation running towards me. "No one wanted to become one with Mother Russia…" he pouted.

"I don't think anyone knows what that means, Ivan." I laughed. I noticed Conner looking at me weirdly. "What? Oh, random child, right. I'm babysitting my friend's little nephew." I lied. Conner narrowed his eyes suspiciously but nodded.

"I AM AWESOME!" I heard a certain albino yell. I sighed.

"I've got to go now. Bye!" I waved, quickly grabbing Ivan and making an exit before Conner could ask any further questions.

I found Prussia in the Youth Room. I managed to pull him out before he could break anyone. America was in the kitchen, but left as soon as I promised him McDonald's on the way home. France was talking to some girls who were looking at him strangely. I grabbed his ear and forcefully dragged him away (Mwahaha). I found England back in the lobby talking to some people. "See! _This_ is normal. You should all try and act like this every once in a while. Be _normal_." I pleaded. I excused England from the group and we all went back to the car.

With much protesting from the other countries, America and I got some McDonald's. What? They have yummy chicken. We went back to the house and I assigned France the task of making the food for the other countries. I changed into a t-shirt and jeans, then tended to the garden until America came out and told me that there was another unit.

"Hey Fred, how've you been?" I greeted.

"Since yesterday? Pretty good; my wife had her baby." he told me.

"Congratulations." I said, signing my name on the line.

"Here you go." He said, handing me the manual. '_FELICIANO VARGAS: User Guide and Manual'_. Cool. I pulled the box in and ran into the kitchen to boil some water.

"Vee! It's dark in here, let me out!" A voice cried from inside the box. I opened it up and was immediately tackle-glomped by a frightened Italian. "Thank you for saving my from the scary box!" he said.

"You're welcome Feli." I gasped, starting to run out of air from the Italian's tight grip. France said that lunch was done, so I called everyone by intercom to come downstairs. There was one thought before I began eating, '_How did the company get my new address?'_

_**=Monochrome-Colors=**_

_That was a derpy ending.  
><em>Sydney: *shrug*  
><em>Ehhhh… Nothing to say…. Too tired.<br>_Kaitlin: At least you're out of school.  
><em>Woop! And I'm sorry this is a really late update, but now that it's summer, I should be updating more (I hope)<br>_America: Yeah!  
><em>You're still here?<br>_America: Duh. You can't get rid of the HERO!  
>Everyone: Yay… *sarcasmsarcasmsarcasm*<br>America: *oblivious*  
><em>Derpy me does not own Hetalia or the manuals.<em>


	6. Chapter 6

"...She was baked... into the chocolate bar..." America practically whispered, his face pale. Even England and Prussia looked slightly disturbed. We had just finished watching an episode of Bones, and I think it may have mentally scarred them. Whoops.

"Yes. Yes she was." I replied, stretching and turning off the TV.

"You watch these kinds of television shows all the time?" England asked.

"Yep, Criminal Minds, NCIS, Bones, and I'm missing a lot, but whatever. I also like movies like Cabin in the Woods. That movie was hilarious." I giggled, making America turn paler.

"T-That was one of the scariest movies ever..." he shuddered, most likely remembering the redneck hillbilly zombies (_A/N: I'm not joking. That's literally what they were called. Or something along those lines...)._

"It really wasn't that scary to me, just a little gory. It had a fairly good plotline, though. Most of the blood was CGI animated, so... Not as effective. Although I suppose it would be pretty hard to get that much fake blood and make it spiral upwards..." I thought aloud. England and Prussia were probably wondering how much blood was actually in the movie. Or they were just scared out of their wits at how casually I was talking about this. I looked at the time and walked over to the call button. "Feliciano, please come down to the kitchen. I need you to make pasta for dinner." I said. I had almost forgotten it was my turn to make food for Youth Group tonight. The teenagers that I teach also must be fed. Although most of the time I just order pizza...

Italy came downstairs and immediately got started on the pasta. The phone started ringing, so naturally, I told America to get it because I didn't want to.

I lay down on the couch and closed my eyes. It was pretty nice until America poked me on the cheek. I glared him down while he handed the phone to me.

"It's for you."

"Well, duh, seeing as I'm the only person who is registered for living here." I muttered, taking the phone. "Hello?"

"_Sydney? It's Kaitlin."_ (_A/N: Italics in quotes mean it's the phone_.)

"Hey Kaitlin, what's up?"

"_You do know that you're teaching younger youth group tonight, right?"_

"I do now." Kaitlin groaned.

"_Sydney, do you have any idea of what you're going to do for a lesson?"_

"Nope. But I'll figure something out. I've got Feli making pasta, so I have thinking food."

"_I thought your thinking food was pocky."_

"...Shush. I gotta go. Bye." I said hastily, hanging up before she could say anything. I walked over to the microphone and pushed the button, "England! Get your British butt down here, I need you to be useful!" I yelled into the mic.

The British nation came downstairs, rubbing his ear. "Bloody ****, do you have to be so loud?" he complained. Baby.

"Get used to it, sweetie." I said, crossing my arms.

He looked at me strangely. "Did you just call me 'sweetie'?" he asked.

"Yes, yes I did. I be southern, deal with it or get out." I said, grabbing his arm and dragging him into my room.

"It's, "I am southern", and why are we in your room?" he asked.

"You and Feli are going to be teaching children's youth group tonight, and I need you to help me write a script so you don't end up teaching them any black magic." I said, flopping down in my computer chair. We were in there for about an hour before finally settling on a lesson.

"Ivan is coming with you guys, he's not old enough to be with the regular youth group I will be teaching." I said, clicking the print button and watching the paper come out of the machine.

"Why can't you teach the younger group?" England asked, clearly not thrilled at the prospect.

"Because the younger ones won't think to ask where you came from." I replied like it was obvious. I looked at the clock. "It's almost time to go." I said, flipping open my cell phone. I scrolled down to a familiar number and hit the call button. "Hey Courtney, can you do me a favor?"

**=Monochrome-Colors=**

"Are you sure it was alright to leave them alone?" England asked once we were in the car.

"Yeah, it's fine. Courtney's with them, so she should prevent anything from breaking...probably..." I said. "Alright, we're here. Get out of my car." They climbed out and we walked off in opposite directions once inside the church.

…

What have I done...

***Third Person- England, Italy, and Russia*******

The trio walked into a room full of kids, ranging from grades 2 to 5. Russia went off to get one of the pieces of paper to draw sunflowers.

"So... Do you know how to calm these kids down?" England asked with a sweatdrop.

"Nope!" Italy chirped, "But let's try this!" he said, putting his fingers to his lips and blowing. A whistled blared through the room, making all the children stop and look at the men who had entered.

"Who the heck are you?" one of the kids, a blonde girl, asked. She looked to be in the fifth grade, with brown eyes under her glasses.

"Uhh... We'll be taking the place of Sydney tonight." England said. The room was quiet.

"We should get started, da?" Russia said, looking up from his drawing.

"Er, yes, yes we should." England said. He stood at the front of the classroom and began to teach the lessons written down on the paper.

***First Person- Sydney*******

I picked up the stuff from my presentation that night and walked downstairs to meet up with Italy, England, and Russia. I waited for a few minutes before I saw England walking down the hallway... With Lydia on his back. I held back laughter as he approached me.

"Hey there, Lydia. Can I ask why you're on Arthur's back?" I laughed, ruffling the blonde girl's hair.

"I thought he was suspicious, so I climbed onto his back and refused to get down until he shows me his identification." Lydia said with authority. I held back more laughter and saluted her.

"Thank you, but I can assure you that they're fine. They're friends of mine who came with me tonight." I said, lifting her off the poor English nation's back.

"Even the kid?" she asked, pointing to Ivan.

"Even the kid. Now, I think your mom's looking for you, so why don't you go find her." I told her, setting the hyper third grader down. She nodded and ran off.

"Ve~ She was nice!" Italy said happily.

"She climbed onto my back..." England grumbled.

"Oh shut it, you big baby, she's only a third grader." I said, rolling my eyes.

"сестра! Look what I drew!" Ivan said, tugging at my pants leg. He handed me a piece of paper covered in yellow flowers, which were apparently sunflowers.

"It looks really good!" I complimented, patting him on the head. He smiled up at me.

"Yo, Sydney!" A voice called. I turned around to see one of my 7th graders walking towards me.

"Hey Caroline." I replied. She walked over and looked at Italy, England, and Russia.

"Who are you guys?" Caroline asked.

"They're some of my tenants. I'm renting out the extra rooms in my house to make a little extra money." I lied. England's glance flickered to me for a second before he decided against saying anything. Caroline inspected them a bit more.

"What's with the kid?" she asked, looking down at Ivan who was now clinging to my leg. I chuckled as I picked him up.

"He's my friend's nephew. I'm babysitting him for her for the time being." I lied again. Geez, I hate lying. But what am I going to tell her? '_These are the personifications of countries and the little one is Russia when he was younger_'? Because that would go over real well.

Caroline nodded and looked at Italy who was smiling happily. She raised an eyebrow at the strange curl sticking out of his hair, but decided it probably wasn't that important. She shook her head and looked towards England.

"Woah..." Caroline said.

"What?" I asked, curious as to what she was fascinated by.

"His eyebrows... They're so big!" Caroline exclaimed. England face palmed and I nearly fell on the ground laughing.

We walked out of the church with Italy, Russia, and I still chuckling. England just fumed like the grumpy person he was.

"Oh, cheer up Iggy. Your eyebrows ain't that big." I laughed. England glared at me.

"My name isn't Iggy, and it's 'isn't' not 'ain't'." he scolded.

"Grammar Nazi." I muttered, punching him in the shoulder.

"What was that for?" England asked, rubbing his shoulder.

"You get punched every time you can't deal with my southern-ness." I declared. England face palmed and tried not to say that 'southern-ness' wasn't a word. Italy and I laughed as we climbed into the car.

**=Monochrome-Colors=**

I stared. The house... It was actually in one piece! I cheered and ran inside, Italy and Russia following me. England, however, had some sense and decided to lock the car first. PSSHT I DIDN'T FORGET AGAIN. Totally. Whatever. Once inside, Prussia, America, and Courtney were all sitting on the couch watching TV.

"Where's France?" I asked.

"He's up in his room because he was being a perv." Courtney said, not taking her eyes off the TV. I walked closer and saw that Swirly was in front of the couch.

"Where does everyone keep getting my address?" I yelled. Swirly looked up at me and shrugged. Deciding I needed a shower, I stripped off my clothes and stepped under the hot running water. I let it fall on me, washing away the stress of hosting countries in my house.

I turned the water off after I finished and stepped back into my room with a towel wrapped around myself. I pulled out a random t-shirt and some pajama pants and put them on. I looked at the time; 8:45. I yawned and decided to go to bed early.

"I'm going to sleep. Anyone who wakes me when it's not morning will die a violent, painful death." I said into the intercom. Turning off the lights, I went over to my bed and crawled in. Sleep soon set in.

My stomach growled. I reluctantly opened my eyes, only to find no blinding light to greet me. I rolled over and looked at my clock. It read 12:31. I groaned and rolled back to my original position, but eventually my grumbling stomach forced me to get up. I grabbed my metal baseball bat that I always kept by my bed and a flashlight. I walked out of my room and into the kitchen. I made myself a sandwich and sat down at the table.

A few minutes later, I heard the soft but unmistakable click of the front door closing. I stiffened and gripped my baseball bat tighter as I listened to the soft footsteps in the lobby. I flipped off the switch on the flashlight and risked a peek out the door. A man that was far too bulky to be any of the countries and dressed in all black was sneaking through the lobby towards the living room. I saw him through the door of the living room at the chest behind the couch. Oh_ heck_ no.

I took a few steps out of the kitchen; the man's back remained turned. I tentatively took the rest of the steps towards him until I was almost directly behind him. I lifted my bat and brought it crashing down on top of his head, effectively knocking him out. Well, that was easier than I thought. I searched him, confiscating a gun and knife, before walking over to the wall phone and dialing 911.

"_Hello, this is 911, what is your emergency?"_ the operator asked in a friendly voice.

"Uhm, hi, I just hit a robber over the head with my baseball bat and took his gun and knife, can you send a policeman or something over to get him?" I asked.

"_Yes, what is your address?"_ I gave the operator my address and they said that someone would be at my house in a few minutes. I hung up and looked up the stairs, seeing Ivan stumble his way downstairs, still half-asleep.

"I thought I heard something down here. Are you okay, сестра?" he asked sleepily. Cute~

"Oh, it's nothing. Just a stupid man who thought he could take my stuff." I replied, swinging the bat over my shoulder. Ivan shifted uncomfortably.

"Can I sleep with you?" he asked nervously. I chuckled a little and nodded, watching him run down the rest of the stairs and to my side. I heard a car pull up the driveway and assumed it was the police. Telling Ivan to go wait in my room, I kept my baseball bat close at hand just in case. I opened the door to a man dressed in a police uniform.

"Police. You called saying that there was a man that attempted to steal?" the policeman asked, sounding bored.

"Yeah, come in. He's in the living room." I said, opening the door wide enough for him to step through. He sighed and walked in, probably not believing my claim. I almost laughed out loud at his face when he found the robber semi-conscious with his hands tied behind his back with some rope I found. He took the man away quickly and I yawned. I went and climbed into my bed, smiling when Ivan snuggled up against me. I closed my eyes and fell asleep.

**=Monochrome-Colors=**

_*slams pen down* DONE!_

Britony: Took ya long enough!

_Shut up. Beta's are supposed to be nice 3_

Sydney: I'm going to die from all these units...

_Don't worry, you're my main character. I won't kill you... Probably..._

_Britony and Sydney: O.O_

_ANYWAYS~ I do not own Hetalia, blah, blah, blah, steal my characters and you die, blah, blah, blah, all that stuff._

_Hasta la rainbows~_

_**=Monochrome-Colors=**_


	7. Chapter 7

I was really starting to hate doorbells. After managing to get out of bed without disturbing Ivan, I stood glaring at Fred and the two boxes behind him.

"Do I even want to know who I got?" I asked grumpily.

"Probably not. Sign please." Fred held out the clipboard to me. I sighed, signing in the desired place. He tipped his hat to me, wished me good luck, and drove off. I pushed the new units inside, just in time to see America and England make their way downstairs.

"Woah, two? Dude, who are they?" America asked, reaching for the folders. I smacked him on the head and took the folders before he had a chance to.

"Mine." I growled, reading over them. He rubbed his head as I read the first folder. '_LOVINO VARGAS: User Guide and Manual_' was printed on the front of the first. I wake him later. I looked at the other folder, but it wasn't labeled. Thinking it was odd, I opened the folder.

'_Sorry!_

_We noticed that we mistakenly delivered you a Chibi!Russia unit, and we sincerely apologize for our mistake. As compensation, please accept this new trial unit!_

_-Flying Mint Bunny Co._'

I blinked. A new trial unit? Something told me that this could not be good.

Deciding to open Romano first instead, I looked at the list of ways to open him. No tomatoes. And I really don't want to pull his curl and get head-butted. The doorbell rang again, jolting me out of my thinking process. It couldn't be Fred, he just left. I walked over and opened the door to find Anna.

"MY COUSIN!" I yelled, immediately hugging her. She cringed a little from the sudden contact, but relaxed into the hug.

"Hey there Sydney." she replied. My cousin's name was Anna, and she was one of the shyest people I know. She has dark brown hair with purple highlights and somewhat lighter brown eyes. I realized that her gaze was frozen to the inside of my house, making me turn around. Inside, France had joined America and England and the three of them were now bickering quite loudly.

"Uh... Meet the units?" I said nervously. Anna shook her head and seemed to be trying to accept the scene in front of her. "I CAN TOTALLY EXPLAIN THIS PREDICAMENT! Uhhh... I fell asleep on my computer and accidentally ordered Hetalia units... That sounded a lot better when I was thinking about it." I explained.

"Yes, because that makes perfect sense." Anna said sarcastically. I shrugged and France took up the conversation.

"Ohonhonhon, why hello there." he said, cupping her chin seductively. Her face turned bright red (TOMATO~) and she grabbed his arm, spun around and flipped him over her shoulder. I'm so proud.

As France was writhing on the ground in pain, Swirly jumped through the door screaming, "WHAT HAPPEN- oh, it's just France in pain. Teehee." she giggled. "Oh, hey there Anna."

"Hi Swirly." Anna replied shyly.

"Anyways, you almost never come here without reason. Is there something I can do for you, Anna?" I asked.

"Huh? Oh, I just brought over some fresh tomatoes." Anna said, holding up a bag of tomatoes. Ok, I've been talking to her this entire time, and I _never_ saw that bag of tomatoes. "Thank you. I need those." I thanked her, taking the bag. I took two out, eating one and putting another in a pot to boil. I turned away from the stove and looked through the doorway into the lobby. The box started shaking, then it tipped over and the lid fell open, allowing a frustrated looking Romano to crawl out.

"OW! Stupid box! Where are the ******* tomatoes?" Romano scowled, shaking his hand in pain. Did he just punch his way out?

I tapped him on his shoulder and handed him a tomato. He took it and ate it with the scowl permanently glued to his face. Delightful.

"Introductions are apparently formal and polite, so let's give it a shot. I'm Sydney, that's Swirly, and that's my cousin Anna. I think you know the rest." I said, introducing everyone in turn.

"That potato-******* isn't here, is he?" Romano asked once he finished his tomato.

"If you mean Germany, no, but he should get here soon since I have Italy. As for Prussia, he-"

"The awesome me is hungry!" Wow. Perfect timing Prussia.

"-is already here. Get your own food; I'm not your freaking servant." I said, addressing the latter part towards Prussia.

"Uh, Sydney?" I heard England say. I turned around to see him backing away from the other box which had started to shake violently. I dove behind a couch and heard the box explode. I looked up and saw...

Female Prussia?

...Oh dear Lord, I'm going to die.

"Woah! She looks like me! And she's hot!" Prussia exclaimed. I rolled my eyes.

"Hey, you look like me! And sexy!" Fem!Prussia said back. I face palmed at them and stood up, walking towards the countries. Fem!Prussia (let's call her Gilberta, shall we?) looked at me as I introduced myself and the others again. "So, where does the awesome me sleep?" she asked directly afterwards.

"There are a bunch of rooms upstairs, you can tell which ones have been occupied. Try your best to pick an unoccupied one." I said, directing her up the stairs. I walked into the kitchen and poured myself a bowl of cereal. "You guys can eat whatever you want; you're all probably better cooks than I am." I said. Romano went upstairs to put his stuff away and came back downstairs followed by Italy.

"Ve~ Sydney, can fratello and I share a room?" Italy asked.

"Sure, I don't care." I shrugged. Italy cheered and Romano grunted.

"Where are the tomatoes?" The southern nation growled.

"What's the magic word?" I said like he was a little kid. He just stared back at me with a scowl. Italy leaned over and whispered in his ear.

"Fratello, you're a bigger ******* idiot than I thought." Romano said.

"Ve~ Trust me!" the northern half of the country begged.

"What do you think the word is Italy?" I asked him, taking another bite of my cereal.

"Is it please?" he asked. I nodded and threw him a box of pasta.

"Go crazy." I said. He cheered and ran to boil some water. Romano was looking at me with a '_WTF_' face. "You mad bro? What's the magic word?" I said tauntingly. He muttered under his breath. "What was that?" I grinned, cupping my hand against my ear.

"******, I said PLEASE!" he yelled. I smirked in triumph and threw him a tomato. He walked off muttering something about a 'crazy *****'. Swirly walked in a little later. For future reference, don't question how my friends get into my house. I don't know. I think that they're all ninjas.

"How many people do you think this leaf has killed?" she asked, holding up a leaf that she probably got from my front yard. I squinted at it intently.

"17." I answered, nodding my head in approval of my answer. She nodded as well, wrote my answer down in a small notebook, and went off to question more people. Kaitlin walked in shortly after that.

"What keeps hot things hot and cold things cold?" she asks. I think for a bit.

"A thermos." I replied.

"Wrong. A pineapple." she said.

"True that." I said. She walked out of the room like nothing ever happened.

"Do that do that often?" Anna asked who had actually been sitting next to me the whole time and had witnessed everything.

"Nope." I replied bluntly, picking up one of my books and began to read, then I ignored everything that happened around me for about two hours. Because I have that much skill.

I was interrupted by America bolting into the room.

"Dude, hide me!" he yelled. I pushed him under the table and resumed reading right as a certain ticked Englishman sprinted into the room.

"Where the **** is that git America?" he huffed, obviously angry. I put down my book.

"What did he do this time?" I sighed, not really in the mood for childish antics.

"He said I was crazy!"

"Because you are, old man!" America yelled from under the table. England's face turned red (from what I could only assume was anger) and he yanked up the tablecloth, dragging out a laughing america.

"I am not!" England yelled. I looked around for Anna and saw that she had probably left a while ago to find a quieter place to read. All this yelling was giving me a headache I didn't need right now, so I picked up my book and went into my room.

**=Monochrome-Colors=**

I had begun the time spent in my room with finishing up a stage for MMD in Google Sketchup, then moved onto finishing a model in PMDEditor, then using that stage and the model in a video. The video was my selfie (the model that I was working on), Haruhi from the Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya, Len, England, and America Caramelldansen. The things that go through my head when I'm bored...

I left the room after I had finished and the video was recording and went into the living room where I found Gilberta, Romano, and America arguing over what to watch on TV. I took the remote and turned on Fullmetal alchemist, then told them all to shut up because we were watching this.

We watched a few episodes before I decided to retreat back to my room like the antisocial person I was. Just kidding, I just didn't feel like leaving the house today. I walked in to find France, Prussia, and England standing at my computer.

"Whatcha doin'?" I asked creepily, and I'm pretty sure an aura close to Russia's was around me. There were people in my room. _MUST KILL_.

"What the **** kind of crack video is this?" Prussia asked, pointing towards the screen. The caramelldansen video was playing and I snickered.

"That is the crack that runs through my head when I'm bored. And when I need to test out physics." I chuckled.

"Why am I in it? And America? That one I suppose looks like you, but who are the other two?" England asked.

"Because I was really bored and I decided to add more models. Watch," I said, pushing them out of my way. I loaded the France and Prussia models I had and added the Caramelldansen motion. "Boosh, I am magical." They looked somewhat confused by the program. I laughed and left the room, pushing them out ahead of me. We went into the kitchen and met everyone else already there eating pasta that Italy made.

The rest of the day passed uneventfully and the next day came. Apparently, America had figured out how to make YouTube play on the TV, and had shown everyone the caramelldansen video. Anna (who had spent the night) just stood there staring at the complete idiots laughing their heads off.

England, America and France had gotten into another fight, Italy was crying for some reason, and Romano was glaring in the direction of the two Prussia's and muttering a few choice words. Ivan was sitting in my lap, staring at the book I was reading. The doorbell rang and I groaned loudly; not another one.

I got out of my seat and walked over to the door while yelling at everyone to shut up. I was starting to get another headache.

Opening the door, I saw Fred (I REMEMBERED HIS NAME THIS TIME~) standing with a clipboard in hand and a big box behind him. I took the clipboard without a word and signed. I traded the clipboard for the manila folder and he left. I pushed the box inside.

"Well... That was quiet." I heard Anna say.

"We're getting used to it. No words are necessary." I said, noticing the box tremble a bit. I looked up and saw Kaitlin sitting on top of the box.

How...

When...

Never mind.

She smiled and waved down at me as I sat there with a bored expression on my face. I flipped open the manual and began reading.

**=Monochrome-Colors=**

Britony: *slaps* YOU'RE LATE.

_I'M SORRRYYYYYYYY_

Anna: …

_Yes people, another character. This is the character designed by the person who answered the last riddle correctly. I will not be accepting anymore characters, sorry._

_Hasta la rain-_

Kaitlin: DISCLAIMER! Monochrome-Colors does not own Hetalia, Swirly, or Anna.

_Ok. That's better. Hasta la rainbows~!_

_**=Monochrome-Colors=**_


End file.
